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BY KELLY PARKS
I was only able to attend the first two of the four-day festivities
this year, but it was well worth it. I picked up some great horror-themed
comics to review (coming soon), and
managed to score a newsworthy tidbit or two.
goes into Superhero mode with vinyl clad beauty, Vera
Vanguard. Here we see Vera saving Feo from the
rendezvoused with Feo, who was part of the Comic-Con Establishment,
working in the Autograph Area as a Celebrity Wrangler. Basically,
this meant his job was to protect the guest celebrities from mentally
unbalanced fanboys like, well, like Feo himself. Talk about the
fox watching the henhouse. Actually, Feo did a bang-up job. I personally
watched him lay the beat-down on a guy who tried to get too close
to Mark Hamill. Feo even let me get in a few kicks to the guy's
gut. (Okay, that's a lie: Feo was tough but
fair, and unfailingly courteous to all, and Mark Hamill is a wonderful
man who actually got down on his hands and knees on the floor to
sign the fan's movie poster. But it sounds better the other way,
Feo and I hatched new and fiendish plans to further our goal of
having feoamante.com take over the entire known world. The first
step is a totally redesigned Comics section with a brand new logo
- check it out at the top of the Fanboy Comics page! That's what
Feo looked like by the end of the con on Sunday! (Whose
blood is that? Let's just say Todd McFarlane may not be back next
year!) And, off to your right, Feo (totally
on his own - honest!) has provided a link so that those inclined
can purchase the new DVD of my movie TEENAGE CAVEMAN. I appreciate
this because I know Feo hates that movie every bit as much as he
loves my other one, THE
terribly under-rated film that excells over 99% of all other vampire
movies -feo). Although I must report that TEENAGE CAVEMAN
got an excellent review at theonion.com,
and has been selected to be shown at the prestigious Berlin Film
Festival! (So everyone can hate it as much as me - feo) Okay, enough
with the shameless self promotion, or that'll be my blood on Feo's
for news from Comic-Con (Feo smacked me around
over my failure to contribute news to this space, so I'm going to
try to do better in the future - the guy packs a mean right cross!),
I didn't get anything earth-shattering, but I did hear the following
tidbits from the presentation by my old boss, special effects maestro
FEO BELIEVED IN ANGELS...
are exactly the kind of angels that I would believe in. The
angel in black is top erotic model Dawn Asumura. The
angel in red is Kimmie Allen.
These two were working a booth downstairs that belonged to Viz Comics, or Wiz comics, or Wizard or Blizzard, Lizard, Gizzard, Grizzled something.
Who gives a shit what booth they worked for?*
The point is, red is a stimulating color, and don't these
gals look hot? I mean, come on Het Guys & Lez
Gals alike: Don't these angels look H-O-T HOT?
is hard at work on T3: RISE OF THE MACHINES, the third installment
in the TERMINATOR franchise, which features the debut of a Lady
Terminator. At the same time, his production company is in the Great
White North shooting WRONG TURN, a thriller about travelers in an
isolated area who run afoul of not-quite-human tormentors: think THE HILLS HAVE EYES, or DELIVERANCE with mutants instead of hillbillies
(I'd make a joke about there not being much
difference in some parts of the Deep South, but my Confederate wife
would kick my Yankee ass).
JAN. 11, 2003: Actually,
they were working for artist Dave Nestler owner of wickedcitystudios.com
from the Miramax/Dimension booth, it sounds like the HELLBOY movie
is coming along great, with Guillermo Del Toro devoting all his
energies to it and creator Mike Mignola still very much involved. If they can do justice to the comic, folks (and
it sounds like they plan to try their damnedest), this is
going to be one hell of a flick. And if they fail, it won't be for
lack of trying.
horror comic coming your way is CRYPTOPIA (see
my review of the first issue) from writer Ben Raab and artist
Pat Quinn. This series is about Cryptozoology, the study of life
forms that have been reported, but not proved to exist, like the
Loch Ness Monster and the Thunderbird (lest
we forget, the gorilla was once in the same category). This
is a real-life field of scientific study that I became interested
in after seeing the MOTHMAN
PROPHECIES movie, and I'm pleased to say that Raab has done
his homework. Check out the review for more details.
GETS POINTERS FROM THE TALL MAN
okay, so I'm tall too. But its hard not to laugh (nervously) when
Angus Scrimm of PHANTASM fame gets into character.
that's it for now. I know, woefully weak considering the cornucopia
of news available at the Con: it's all Feo's fault, he didn't show
up until Friday because he was playing the rock star, meeting with
publishers about his burgeoning literary career, so I was without
guidance and direction for one whole day. A taste of fame and he
turns into a prima donna!
FOLLOWING IS FROM FEO
SCIENCE MOMENT WITH KEN FOREE
knows that Kelly Parks is our resident scientist at Horror Movies,
and DAWN OF THE DEAD is one of the best S.F./Horror movies EVER! Ken Foree is
SHE SIGNED. I FLIPPED!
incredibly lovely Marina Sirtis of STAR TREK: First Contact, was
happy to sign for eveyone. I was happy to see that she wore NO BRA
and a VERY sheer see-through blouse! YOW!
IS SO COOL ITS SCARY
Bannister of the PHANTASM films exudes cool. George Jones and Johnny Paycheck once said "When
you're as ugly as us, you just naturally gotta be cool!" So
I guess we're the two coolest guys at the con.
You're right! She's hot too!
Devil Child of KISS, Gene Simmons, is an unrepetent fanboy where
comics are concerned. Its easy to get his autograph, but hard to
keep up as he goes running all over the con gawking at the treasure
trove of graphic literature.
And er...people watching.
the celebrities at the San Diego ComicCon can be a mixed bag. Whether
its ego or they are just jerks (or perhaps
because they are jerks they can't get a job no more) who
knows? But Lucy Lui was nothing less than class and sweetness. Her
handlers, however, were jerks.
BREWSTER AND KELLY
Where was Access Hollywood when THIS photo was taken? Why
is Kelly Parks of the Internet's feoamante.com fame hanging out
with this actress? How did she capture his heart?
YOU FANS OF PLAYBOY
Playboy models are there too. And this time, my brother Sean wasn't
there to ignore them! So here is a photo of me and the delectable
Playmate of the month (Feb. 1995),
Lisa Marie Scott.
When you're beautiful, smart, and sweet, women like Lisa Marie will
pose with you too!
PLACE TO BE
between artist model NuTOPIA and artist ARANKA ISRANI made me think: You know all those
newspaper and magazine columns you always read, about males who
read comic books? How they are social misfits who can't connect
with the opposite sex? Yeah, me too. But let me tell you something,
I've been to one HELL of a lot of conventions and you will
never see a better population of the world's finest looking gals
than you will see - just walking around - at a ComicCon!
LAST! ITS OVER!
Forster, Supervisor of the Autograph area, and Byron Gray, Big Chief
of the Elite III Security folks on the Sail Pavilion, enjoy an exhausted
collapse. Their hard work over the 4 day convention paid off, everyone
went home reasonably happy, and if past years are any indication,
the 2003 ComicCon will be even bigger than the 2002.
This pictorial hasn't even scratched the surface of what goes on
at the San Diego ComicCon. So for more info, go to comiccon.org.
PHOTO BY HART
PLACE TO BE
for me, my baby was busy elsewhere during the con, but the one gal
I enjoy holding the most is my sweet wife, Luz.