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Movies Ken King Review by
Ken King
A Cadaver Christmas
THANK YOU
TIP JAR
A CADAVER CHRISTMAS - 2011
USA Release: April 2, 2011
Cadaver Productions, Natural Wipes Films Production, SIlver Oaks Communications
Rating: USA: PG-13

"You're not going to start shooting my customers again, are you, Sam?"
-Eddie

To call this movie INSANE would be sugar coating it by quite a little bit. I'm not one hundred percent certain there is an actual term, or word, to properly describe what you will be treated to upon viewing this masterpiece of out-there-past-Pluto cinematic genius. All I can say is watch this. Watch it as soon as the opportunity arises. If it doesn't occur as soon as you read this review, make that opportunity arise.

THIS FLICK IS ABSOLUTELY CRAPTASTIC!!!

You will be tempted in the very first 5 mins. or so to change the movie over to something else. Don't. I almost made this grave error, but I decided to hang with it for a bit longer, and I can say without any reservations, that was one of the best film decisions I ever made.

A CADAVER CHRISTMAS is a definite Indy flick and looks like it might have been shot on a minimal budget. Scratch that; a very micro budget, but it is shot in a Grindhouse style of film making and has the usual lines, scratches, cigarette burns, etc. But nothing is wrong with the sound and that is a HUGE plus. If there had been an issue with audio, this would have plunged big time.

Director/Editor/Co-Writer, Joe Zerull, knew just what the fuck he was doing when he made this. Most of his work is with short films, but I hope he does another feature length feature in the future.

The leads in this flick are mostly active in Chicago made short films, but they were superb in their individual roles in this movie. We have Daniel Rairdin-Hale (also co-writer and Producer), as Chester "The Janitor" Peaton, Hanlon Smith-Dorsey (also co-writer), as Tom Tunninbum (DIMENSIONS, LIVING WHILE FALLING), Yosh Hayashi, as Sam Sheriff (FOLLOWED), Ben Hopkins, as Eddie (PSYCHO MAGNET), Jessica Denney, as Kristen Stable (AMELIA 2.0) and Andrew Harvey, as The Perp.

The Janitor pops into a bar on Christmas Eve. The only people there are the bartender, Eddie, and one patron, Tom. The newcomer is covered in blood and asks where the bathroom is located. Eddie points him in that direction and then promptly calls the police. Sam appears a short time thereafter and is about to arrest the Janitor. Outside, "Cadavers" (Not Zombies. The Janitor will correct you very quickly) have surrounded his car and are attacking The Perp in the back seat. What the dude has been picked up for had me laughing for a long time afterwards.

Eventually, the four men (Eddie and Tom are along for the ride, not wanting to be hanging around at the bar with the Zom…er, Cadavers, that Sam recommended they lock in the establishment) head to the university where the "outbreak" has occurred. There, they add to the group, Kristen, who is studying various police techniques to become an officer but is working as a security officer at the university for the past two years. The gang run into all sorts of trouble and with very few weapons to combat it with. They find out who and what caused the cadavers to get up and start their obligatory flesh munching. A professor named, Hildencress (Michael Kennedy: THE BRIDE WORE BLOOD) in a desperate attempt to raise his wife from the dead after she died from cancer of the brain, decided to experiment on other dead bodies to see if his new serum would work on them, first, and if so, use it on his wife.

Thriller-ish

Trials prove less than satisfactory to say the least.

Yes, if you see no other Christmas Horror flicks but one this year, make A CADAVER CHRISTMAS that one. Hell, the same could be said for Zombies. I thought the genre had given us all it could and was completely FUBAR. I am happy to report that such is not the case. There's still life to breathe into this occasionally beyond dead subject.

FINAL THOUGHTS
I'm not sure why this flick is coming to my attention just now. It's nine years old. I should have known about it long before today. It's not very SFX heavy. It doesn't need to be. I'm sure that decision was an intentional one to get the desired effect that this movie could have been shot in any time period. A CADAVER CHRISTMAS is so over the top you will find yourself howling with laughter in several spots in this film.

Funny flick?

Oh, my God, yes!

Watch this movie through to the end of the credits. There are all sorts of shenanigans going down throughout. Color me one satisfied customer.

Five Negative Shriek Girls.

Negative Shriek GirlNegative Shriek GirlNegative Shriek GirlNegative Shriek GirlNegative Shriek Girl
This review copyright 2020 E.C.McMullen Jr.

A Cadaver Christmas (2011) on IMDb
DRESS NICE
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