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Newsweek magazine, already one foot from tabloid grave when they broke the story, a few years ago, of a U.S. soldier flushing a Koran down a toilet (even the most gullible idiot looked at that and said to themself "How the hell can you possibly flush a book down a toilet? Newsweek later admitted that they were, in essence, reporting rumor as fact) now brings us their version of Horror and it's auteurs.
The story written by David Gordon is laughable on so many accounts. The headline reads: Horror No Longer Scares Hollywood (now changed to Greetings From Horrorwood), and goes on to talk about all of the A-list'ers who now have no qualms about starring in a Horror movie.
Ri-ight.
Writing from the realm of ignorance is hardly new to Newsweek, but this article is about our home so here we go.
The story goes on to mention said A-Listers who, thanks to their starring in Rodriguez and Tarantino's GRINDHOUSE, prove that they are - only now - unafraid to star in Horror. Names like Bruce Willis (THE SIXTH SENSE, UNBREAKABLE), are no longer afraid to star in gory movies (like, I suppose the ultra gory Bruce Willis Horror comedy, DEATH BECOMES HER - 1992). Or maybe its not the Horror and just the gore that Bruce no longer fears (like his ultra gory role in SIN CITY [2005], also directed by Robert Rodriguez). Or perhaps Newsweek's real point is that A-Listers are no longer afraid to work with Rodriguez or Tarantino (like Bruce did with Tarantino in PULP FICTION [1994]).
Gordon lists other A-List stars that apparently, only now, are willing to star in lurid Rodriguez or Tarantino Horror movies. Stars like Rosario Dawson, who also starred in the lurid and gory SIN CITY and THE DEVIL'S REJECTS (though her scenes were cut from the latter).
Does Gordon even bother with the most rudimentary of searches to verify his own story - For Which he is getting paid? Why wouldn't Dawson and Willis, who've starred in gory movies with these two directors before, not be willing to do it again?
Gordon goes on to mention other actors in other horror movies. Actors like Luke Wilson (he's an A-Lister?) will soon be seen in the Horror slasher flick VACANCY. So unlike his work in such Horror fare as SCREAM 2 or SOUL SURVIVORS, or his turn on the X-Files as a Vampire cop. Luke hasn't led a hit since 2003's Old School and that was a co-lead in a Will Ferrell comedy (Will is Luke's bud). And with his recent string of flops, Luke should be willing to work as a guest star on any failing sitcom he can find (actually, he did that from 2002 to 2005 on That 70s Show).
Other top actors and Oscar winners that will lead scary movies in the coming months are Halle Berry (XMEN movies, GOTHIKA) will star in PERFECT STRANGER (which isn't Horror, it's a drama Thriller).
Hilary Swank (BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER, SOMETIMES THEY COME BACK...AGAIN, THE GIFT, THE CORE) is starring in THE REAPING.
Nichole Kidman (DEAD CALM, THE OTHERS, THE STEPFORD WIVES) and her upcoming film, THE INVASION.
Renée Zellweger (MY BOYFRIEND'S BACK, THE RETURN OF THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE) with CASE 39.
and Ashley Judd - who has made her name in scary Thrillers (NATURAL BORN KILLERS [scenes deleted],
A TIME TO KILL, KISS THE GIRLS, EYE OF THE BEHOLDER, DOUBLE JEOPARDY, TWISTED).
Now if this article was completly straight about Horror, then it may have squeeked by with some amount of questionable credibility, a judgement call in other words. But you throw in the word "scary" and then start rattling off Thrillers (especially freaking Crime Thrillers!) in the same mold as straight on Horror, and you are edging toward Stephen Glass territory. Here at feoamante.com we cover Horror, Thriller, Mystery, and Suspense, and I call this a Horror Thriller site. But we clearly understand all four story-telling methods as well as their place, appearance, and mutations.
I don't know what actors are out there who are so scared to do Horror, Thriller or Horror Thrillers, but it damn sure ain't this bunch!
The next time Newsweek wants a knowledgable article on Horror, they'd do well to assign someone to the story who knows what they are writing about.
E.C.McMullen Jr. article first posted on April 10, 2007
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