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FAT ABSORB 2
The Pseudo Psychic Saga

E.C.McMullen Jr. October 28, 2001 Report by
E.C.McMullen Jr.
Copyright 2002 by E.C.McMullen Jr. for feoamante.com

There is a new product online called FAT ABSORB which, while it doesn't have the 'tude of Miss Cleo, never the less makes outrageous claims for its weight loss "produt". I have created this intentional satire of their spam (and atrocious grammar and misspellings) so you will get a chuckle when you see it. This page in no way is meant to represent FAT ABSORB. It is purely meant to make fun of the company at their own expense.

 

 

From The Desk Of Lawrence Gite:

Hello my dear friend FEO AMANTE.

You seem to be smart. Therefore I know you will be as exited as me about this great new produt. I could tell you many wonderful things about it alone, but I'll let the advertisement explain itself.

 

 

 

AS SEEN ON TV*

and NOW Directly into you mail box and with the
Tremendous Savings
yet!

Yes, YOU too can loose weight with

1

is a new consept in loosing weight for both men and the women. This new produt actually Eats the Fats from the foods you get too eat every day.

By eatting those fats, makes less amounts of calories you get from those fats by
1. Preventing those excess fats from getting into you body!
attracts fat like crazy! It lures fat out of hiding and into the open areas of you system. Then, once the fat gets close enough WHAM!

captures it, eats it, then passes out of you're butt when you go too the bathroom.


FAT ABSORB TWO ABSORBS FAT BY EATING IT!

Not only is a significant aid too weight loss, it also does other stuff like helps lower you cholesterol and troglyceride intake.

is usually working when your not - so its naturally and safely. In fact, it often works while you sleeping - so you don't feel it so much.

See at some of benefits!

1. HAS NO STIMULANTS OF ANY KIND! - Do Not Use stimulants while using FAT ABSORB TWO. We cannot be held liable for stimulant intake while using FAT ABSORB TWO.
2. Helps you lose weight while eatting naturally. - You Must Eat Naturally for FAT ABSORB TWO too work. We cannot be held liable for side effecs caused by unnatural eatting when using FAT ABSORB TWO.
3. BLOCKS DIETARY FAT BEFORE IT REACHES YOU STOMACH! FAT ABSORB TWO ATTACKS FAT WHILE IT IS IN YOU THROAT! THE BATTLE TAKES PLACE THEIR!
4. ABSORBS UP TO 10 TIMES ITS WEIGHT IN DIETARY FAT! - You Must Make Sure that you are eatting enough dietery fat for FAT ABSORB TWO to work. We cannot be held responsible for anything else FAT ABSORB TWO chooses to eat when it is not given enough dietery fat intake.
5. EATS FAT - MAKING IT NUTRITIONALLY UNAVAILABLE!
6. FAT ABSORB TWO IS ALL NATURAL! - It is only found in the wood of reelly old rain forest trees and ponds.

is a natural bacteria that, like a stalker, is attracted to fat, especially harmful saturated fat. Loosing fat and cholesterol is what you want to do if you want to be youthy and beautiful. It is also eccential for having more health.

You buy at low amazing low price of $25.95. That's $20.00 off the everyday price! Be the First 10,000 People to order, and YOU may recieve the additional bottle for FREE!! Do you or love one the big favor and order NOW!!! To order call 1-888-455-2728 24 hours a day!
Live Operators Standing By!
*Notice: Unconditional 30 day money back gaurantee. Just send back unused pills and you will receive the prompt REFUND for them!!

 

We are linked too 1,000's of web sites that offer free subscripcions to our mailing list. Please find them.

You may UNSUBSCRIBE from this list at any time by following the simple instructions that can be found at the end of this email.
If you would like to be unsubscribe, put unsubscribe in the subject field sure to be removed.. then click send OR Toll Free Call 1-800-813-8612 Customer Service Department

*Cops, 60 minutes, and 20/20.


1
. We were forced by U.S. Government beaureaucrats to remove the FAT ABSORB from the market (although it is still available at Swap Meets and Flea Markets in both the U.S. and Columbia!) when it was claimed that it our product caused genital loss. What about all of our customers who did not complain? Who no one has heard from? When will THEIR story be told? When will the U.S. government stop the regulating the free market to death? When will they stop killing the healthy competition and free trade? Stop your U.S. Government now!

A product of Feo Amante Home and Health Care. Feoamante.com

EndSkull

 

 
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